Oh snap! Em's gettin deep

Hello there!! So were gunna into some semi deep stuff today! So if you've read the first post or clicked the "beliefs" tab then you will know that I am Mormon! I belong to the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints! I know it, I live it, I love it! So as a 19 year young women I have decided to leave my home, my family,put of my education and job to serve an 18 month mission! I am so excited and as of right now I am in the midst of the paperwork so this is kindof premature, okay really premature but I have a lot of feelings and a whole lot to be grateful for!

 As this process has taken place, it has been quite the emotional roller coaster that has been going on for the past year honestly. Before I left for school I thought about serving a mission but pushed it out of my mind. The thought kept persisting until I finally accepted it and prayed to know if a mission was right for me and honestly I had no idea what Heavenly Father was telling me. I knew He heard me and I know He cares but I felt like I wasn't getting the feed back I was looking for. I think I was looking for some super spiritual obvious sign and that's not really how the Lord works. I finally went to my Bishop and he gave me the council I defiantly needed. He said that sometimes the Lord won't directly answer but will have us start a path and trusts us to decide what we should do .So I felt that I should start my paperwork! I was later sitting in institute when the teacher said something that really stuck out to me. He said that he believes that the Lord doesn't really care what we choose to do like choosing a school, job or place to live for example, he cares that we have the faith to come to Him for guidance. I just thought that was interesting anyways.

 Every day I found myself making a decision on whether not I wanted to serve or go back to school.. I received my answer and boy was I happy to just feel so much peace from making that decision. I used to think that once I made the decision life would get easier, that it wouldn't be as hard to read my scriptures or pray. But it is still an effort everyday to do the things I need to prepare to go. I think that hardest thing right now is not letting my fears and self doubts overcome my desire to serve and have  faith in the Lord that with His help I can do this. Every single day that is a struggle I have to overcome, and I know that it will not get easier it will probably get harder but I know with the Lords help I can do it. Satan  knows where your weak spots are and will just kick you when your down. But Christ also knows our weaknesses, the difference is that through Christ we can overcome those weaknesses and turn them into strengths and for that I am so incredibly grateful. I am so grateful for the opportunity to serve and so excited for this adventure that I am preparing for. I just wanted to put my perspective out there! Have a wonderful week!

With love
Em <3